Here we go with another 'Tomb Raider' movie

Written by: Carlos Zotomayor

Film | Sep 20, 2017

Alicia Vikander Lara Croft Square Enix Tomb Raider Warner Bros

Even though her real-life origins can be traced to what's in-between the adolescent male's legs, there is more to Lara Croft than just being a woman attached to a pair of boobs.

For instance: she is also a psychopath masking as an explorer. When she isn't raiding tombs, the rest of her time is spent massacring small armies consisting solely of burly men. It is this dual personality that the new Tomb Raider movie explores without the aid of Angelina Jolie.

Now starring Alicia Vikander, this rebooted film of a rebooted franchise looks like a faithful adaptation of Square Enix's take on Nathan Drake's ancestor.

A little... too faithful, if you look closely.

There is the change of focus from Lara's womanly figure to throwing her body at anything remotely harmful. There is her culturally-diverse set of friends, all of whom warn her of the dangers that come with spelunking and manhunts. Then there is the bow, which is somehow just as useful as any modern gun.

Video game movies always follow a trend of promising too much then ending up as stale as Adam Sandler's jokes, if not worse. Tomb Raider might be another flop when it hits theaters in 2018, but at least it isn't targeting horny teenagers anymore.

About the author: Carlos Zotomayor

Zoto can see your underpants. Mmm... tasteful.

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