Wow, this game came out of nowhere. It just popped up in my Steam account and I was like, whoa! An RE spinoff designed for competitive online multiplayer action.

Well, this game is a horrible mess. It's a glitch-infestation, has bad animations, and just all the bad stuff everyone could possibly imagine thrown into the mix. What the hell were they thinking?

Allow me to go into a bit of detail. First off, what is Umbrella Corps? It's an over-the-shoulder shooter game based on Resident Evil. You play as people-who I think, are mercenaries. It's often mercenaries or a private army-which in this case, I think, is the latter-because, Umbrella Corps.

I have played this game the other day. I tried the solo mission first, just to get a nice feel about the game. And... it really wasn't a pleasant experience.

The multiplayer aspect allowed me to doze off for thirty minutes while waiting for all six player slots to be filled. You can just about read a quarter through the first Harry Potter book before a single slot fills up. No one likes to play this game. And I can only guess, the only ones playing this game at all are the ones finding about it for the first time or checking out why all the hate. Either way, it's money down the drain.

I'll try to be just here. The multiplayer is a three-on-three match between players insane enough to play this game. You should shoot each other until everyone on the other team is dead. But this ain't no RE game without a few "Zs" here and there, right? Right goddamn it! It's a great idea really, while you're distracted by shooting other people, zombies can creep up behind you and munch on your brain. However, that doesn't work. Zombies are stagnant shits. They don't move. They will only stare at you, go "grrruuuah" and do nothing. If an opposing player shoots you, like, in the head, that's when Capcom punishes you for being such a n00b by suddenly putting zombies on aggro.

It's a sick twisted joke. All the random words spurting like "EDGE OF DEFEAT" or something or whatever, are cheesy and distracting. The mini-map in the middle of the screen is large enough to be distracting and it looks bad enough that it won't be much of help for navigation.

If you purchase this game, don't ever think of playing it. Just go get a refund if it's still possible. Go to YouTube, don't let the misery of purchasing this game seep into you. Save yourself, like, really.

The mere fact that this game just rose from the deepest, darkest parts of the abyss sent chills up my goddamn spine. I've heard idiotic complaints about the possibility of Marvel and Fox planning to do a cross-over-which is probably Avengers Vs. X-Men-and people had been calling it a money grab-no shit dumbass. Every business is a money grab. The Marvel-Fox tie-up sure is a possible high-profit project. It could be the type of money grab that satisfies consumers long after the movie. Like cigarettes after great sex. Umbrella Corps on the other hand, is the kind of money grab that is bad. It is just plain horrible.

I'm no great writer, never been one really, so I'm hard-pressed to come up with new, super powered words that would allow me to exhibit how much I loathe this game. I can find none. It is just plain horrible. Period.

How I see it, Umbrella Corps is a quick money grab to fund other bigger projects-such as Resident Evil 7: biohazard. Now that game, is another story. Click HERE for my review. 

About the author: Karen Benitez

Skater, musician, carpenter, gamer. Karen is interested in culture, science fiction, and Cthulhu. She participated in MMA bouts, got her ass kicked many times, and ended up with broken bones. Life is good.

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